HAPPY HALLOWEEDTA SISTERSS

So I dont know, how, why and what is going on... I dont know why u are making a show.... U can do whatever u want but when I do something is wrong what the fuck is wrong with u.. U started everything u left me u fuck another woman and now u act like u want me back well fucked noo I dont wanna get back with u.. I like my life the way is going I am happy the way I am, I am happy with the girl I like... I dont need u to do this in my life...

Changing everything... Sometimes I think I should pop the question.. But i dont want to rush anything and It makes me feel that If I pop the question everything is going to fuck up and that is something that I dont want... I dont know what is going on I just cant take that girl out of my head and my sistem.... Is that BAD??

Now I am worried for 3 of my friends one of then is like her EX was at her house and Star hitting her what the fuck is wrong with that woman dammit.. The other one is like her EX EX girlfriend is now with the one that was her EX 1 month ago what a bitch she is really suffering and I dont know what to say to her... And the other one her mom is really sick and almost dying and I cant find her... I am fucking worried for this women and I dont knowwwww
ARGGGG....

Wohoo, I got out from a surgery today.. Yes I am fine.. Dont know how it doesnt even hurt... Yayyyyy
The nurses there where having so much fun with me I was making jokes all the time they where like what is wrong with this girl... I was smiling the whole operation yes I was awake... I had a lot of fun today at the surgery room hahaha the nurses became my friends.. The where like what are u studying I told them like to be a Teacher they said That i was going to be a great teacher it make me proud of myself... I want my bed....

So what about today... It Just happen... Just happen... Another day like any other...
I just learn that she fuck another woman... No coming back which I already knew and I didnt want it.. But fucking hurts that she say it like I was her friend..
Conversation #1
Me - So how are u?
Ex - Fine and u?
Me - fine so what are u doing?
Ex - Look this girl say that she wanna fuck me again...
Me - Again???
Ex - sorry I didnt say anything...
Me - What happen with her u told nothing happen?
Ex - Just Fingering.. She did it to me and I did it to her....
Me - HMMMMMMMMMM
Ex - U ok?
Me - HMMMMMMMMMM

Yeah uninteresting.... what can I say u dont tell your ex shit like that unless u wanna hurt her...
I always ask myself why I am so good and stupid at the same time to keep on listening to that shit...
Yes I know that I talk about her a lot but I need to take all this shit out of my system I dont feel anything for her anymore I am actually over her but I need this kind of shit out of me....
At this moment I like this girl that I meet exactly a month ago.. I saw her, and I like her just at that moment, so I yell at her asking for her number ( sorry) I was drunk hahaha... She is amazing, funny, cute, all in one... so wanna see her??
She will kill me for putting da pick.. I dont think sooo
Say HI GIRLY

Well I got into an Argue with my ex today she say that I am manipulating her... Hello she do the same shit... It was the kind of argue were u say everything that u have in your mind... and I couldnt realize that I told her that i already lost her.. and she told me u lost me the day that we broke up... actually the day that she left me behind in her life like I was nothing, like I was never there, I never exist in her life she never change mine and i never change hers... which is a lie cuz she change my life in every single way that u would never imagine.. and I stop being that shy and pathetic kid that I used to be and I began to understand the meaning of love.. But evrything is just lost... part of my past and her past.. Nothing happen here and it will never happen.. because sometimes i think it would have been better it she wouldnt have meet me.. But god knows what he did and why he did it.. Itsnt ?
Love what is love? It is imposible to find it? It is so hard for me to love, to feel that passion for someone else. That everytime that u see her you feel more alive, your eyes shine, you start to sweat because u love her. That you know she was made for u, and all u need is love from her, seeing her smile, hearing her voice, just looking at her face and all the happiness that she bring to your life. Love can kill you? It will destroy you, one day you'll wake up and she wont be there she will be part of your past and jsut the pictures of her u would have left. To remember, to realize that she is not your woman anymore, to wake up, to get up from this life, this misery, and start living without her........

So my life has been really interesting lately... I am kind of better with my ex.. Like I am over it or something... Of course is been interesting because I am going on surgery the 28.. GOD i am fucking scare that I wont wake up again..Which is not going to happen is just me saying .. But for that my sister is going to spoil me and put this funny faces for me WAHAHAHA

Today is Saturday.. Wow is weekend I am going out... Whatever..

Yes I am going out with my bandmates, we always practice on Saturdays.. I feel kind of down just a little bit
I think I am recovering from my ex (SURE WHATEVER) She is the only thing that I can think and someone else
but that is SHHHH.. Hahaha At this moment I think I should behave and let everything happen by destiny..What do u think? I should or I shouldnt...

Yes I have wrote a lot of shit today it means I am bored and depressed...

ANOUK - "Sacrifice"

Who's the one that makes you happy
Who's the one that always makes you laugh
Who's the reason you're smiling
And dragged you through these time, so rough
I was the one that made you happy
I was the one that eased the pain
But I'm the reason that you're crying now
My own tears scattered by the rain
You can sacrifice me
You can sacrifice me
You can set me free
You can be who you wanna be
Deeper than deep you took me on a trip baby
You shared your wildest dreams and more
You dare me to express my feelings to you
I never felt that need before
But suddenly you needed freedom
You felt the need to break free
You started drowning in your sorrow
You didn't wanna know I had the key
You can sacrifice me
You can sacrifice me
You can set me free
You can be who you wanna to be

So yes I haven't wrote since I got here.. Hmmm July or something... But is like why bothering on writing something like my heart is completly broken because of what o yeah my ex... the one that left me.. well is we broke up together both of us "wanted" to.. Sure I wanted it so much (Sarcastic mode on)... Yes I have wrote songs that have help me during the changings in my life since the last to months when everything was perfect and now is not.. Yes I have had people that have help me during the my new way of happiness like Victoria, Vero, Nady, Albe, even Uncle Pops.. But I am still not happy...



Yes I was happy for at that time now is like...



That is what is being happening with my life.. Hope next time i'll be happier........

Thanks to Victoria for this song....

RAIZED IN BLACK "Visions"

I need a reason to be wrong I need a reason to believe Compassion for the choices made has dithered It's time to let the senseless pass Time to prick this psychopath End this hang-man game of resolution You said that it was just for now The wait is far too long Why can't we bring things back Just like they were before As days go by I wonder Which thoughts collide about me It's time to face the consequence Time to see this through Terminate the silence that you're bound to You said that it was just for now The wait is far too long Why can't we bring things back Just like they were before Visions of our past..

K'S CHOICE "Weak"
Lost in time I can't count the words Said when I thought they went unheard All of those harsh thoughts so unkind' Cos I wanted you(And) now I sit here I'm all alone So here sits a fucking mess, tears fly home A circle of angels, deep in war' Cos I wanted you Weak as I am, no tears for you Weak as I am, no tears for you Deep is I am, I'm no ones fool Weak as I am And what am I now but loves last home I'm all of the soft words I once owned If I opened my heart, there'd be no space for air 'Cos I wanted you With this tainted soul In this weak young heart Am I too much for you.

K'S CHOICE "I Will Return To You"
Today there's nothing more to say But someday I'll return to you Today things didn't go our way Maybe tomorrow I will return to you Today I'd like to slip away from all this pain Someday, I'll return to you Today I'd like to be a cell inside your vein Maybe tomorrow I will return to you Once more I'd like to put a spider in your bed For that, I will return to you I want you to hear the things I never said For that, I will return to you Someday, I'll return to you Dry the rain inside my head To hear the things I never said I will return to you To be a light beam through a cloud To laugh at things I'm singing now I will, I will return to you I will return to you, to you I will return to you Someday I'll return to youI will return to you Maybe tomorrow I will return to you.